


Not Wanted

by smolbunprincess



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Child Abuse, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Hurt/Comfort, Physical Abuse, Pink Steven doesn't mess around, Sleep Deprivation, Starvation, Swearing, based off a friend's idea, gems are poofed, it might be a lil rushed and odd pacing im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:56:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22293685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolbunprincess/pseuds/smolbunprincess
Summary: What if Steven wasn't accidentally neglected in his childhood?
Relationships: Connie Maheswaran & Steven Universe, Pink Steven Universe & Steven Universe
Comments: 14
Kudos: 211





	Not Wanted

**Author's Note:**

> Inspiration came from my friend Chills! I hope you enjoy.

Connie always had a feeling something was, off. From the very beginning when she met Steven, a young energetic boy born from a gem. He piqued her interest, and worried her considerably.

For starters, he was thin. A little _too_ thin, his clothes didn't fit him well and were oversized. There was also his family. He talked so excitedly about the gems, describing to her in detail about how amazing they were and how excited he was to be just like them. She never met them, but she did meet his dad. She liked his dad, he was the exact kind of person she expected to be Steven's dad. Goofy, musical and caring.

Connie was able to watch how Steven's dad would always look over him carefully. Examining him, like he wasn't sure this was real or not. His expression was a perfect visual of concern, and he reached to tuck one of Steven's curls behind his ear.

"He Stu-ball." His expression and tone are equal parts concerned and tender. He reached to cup his cheek, but Steven would tense a little. Connie could see the teeniest tiniest hint of uncertainty in Steven's eyes but she blinked and it was gone. "You doin' okay kiddo? Gems treatin' you alright?"

"Oh yeah!" Steven brightened, bouncing on his heel and twirling. "I had another training session with Amethyst! I managed to block three of her seventeen hundred attacks! She almost looked impressed, but then Pearl showed up and they got into a massive argument."

"What was it about?" Connie inquired curiously, watching as Steven tapped his finger against his chin. She was able to see fresh bruises and healing scars along his arm.

"I think we were making too much of a ruckus, it upset Pearl. Said she wished we didn't do it so close to the house, that we should be better." Steven explained, shrugging slightly. "Pearl didn't seem impressed when I told her how I was able to summon my bubble, said I should be able to without thinking about it now."

"You've only been training for a week now." Greg pointed out.

"Yeah, but she said a real gem would've mastered it by now." Steven sounded disappointed, Connie laid a hand on his shoulder to comfort him. Yet as soon as her hand touched him, he flinched away and raised his arms to defend himself. The action caused more bruises to show, more injuries.

"Steven?" She asked softly, but he could only look at her. He shivered, visibly sweating as he lowered his arms slowly.

"Hahah! Well, look at the sun! I gotta go!" Without another word to either of them, Steven ran.

Connie watched as he ran, slowly peering at Greg when Steven disappeared. He sighed heavily, moving to tidy up. He placed the empty wrappers of their food into the bin. Steven hardly ate anything, it was worrying.

"Is.. Is Steven okay?" She asked, putting her books away into her book bag. Greg looked at her, his eyes the reflection of someone who has spent many nights worrying.

"He just wants to be like the gems." He explained softly, siting down with a heavy sigh. Connie joined him, sitting down on one of the deck chairs he pulled out earlier. "He's doing everything he can, y'know? The gems aren't like us, they don't need anything. No food, no sleep.. They don't get hurt the way that we do."

"The way _Steven_ does." Connie murmured, and Greg nodded solemnly. "Couldn't you get him to live with you?"

"Can't. I don't know anything about gem stuff. He wants to live with them, to be just like them.." He sighed, with a small smile as he continued. "It's really sweet, how much he admires him. He really wants to be a crystal gem."

Connie watched him as Greg watched the citizens of Beach City walk around, no worries or concerns in mind. He looked exhausted from a battle she couldn't see, his shoulder slumped and she could see the defeat in his eyes.

"Humans are weak." Greg continued. "We're soft, fragile. The gems see us inferior, they see him as inferior because he isn't like them. He isn't like us either, I think it really hurts him."

"Is there anything we can do for him?"

"I don't know."

\---

A few days later, Connie came to visit again. She didn't know what she was expecting. The beach was serene, exactly what she expected truthfully. Connie loved the beach, it was the perfect reading spot and a great way to see Steven. If he was around.

She had just stepped onto the beach when Steven was thrown. He landed with a thump, not getting up as an unfamiliar purple person approached. Connie hid behind a boulder, watching the duo worriedly. What was going on?

"This is all your fault!" She screamed, bringing her fist down on Steven's shoulder. There was an audible crack, and Connie winced at the noise. "If you hadn't been there, I would've destroyed that monster and Garnet wouldn't have thrown me!"

Garnet.. Was this one of the gems? Why was she hitting Steven?

"Pathetic, useless!" She kicked him before grabbing him and flinging him towards Connie's hiding place. He smacked against the boulder with a sharp cry. The boulder cracked from the force, and Steven slumped on the ground. Connie could smell his blood. "If you weren't here then Rose would be here! If you didn't exist, the rest of us would be happy!"

Connie pressed against the boulder, doing everything she could to hide as she heard different noises. Next was the audible sound of a whip, slapping against skin followed by whimpers.

"If you come back into the house, I'm ripping your spine out and play golf with your head! You piece of shit! This is all your fault!" Another crack of the whip. "You humans are so fucking fragile! So useless! You're never going to be a crystal gem when you're so pathetic! You never should have been made!"

She watched as the purple stranger stalked off, grumbling to herself. Connie waited for a moment, before slowly inching out from behind the boulder. The sight before her caused her to gasp.

Steven laid on the ground, covered in bruises and blood. His clothes had been torn all over his body, long angry gashes on his exposed skin. There was dark purple bruising on his shoulder, his eyes was badly swollen.

Connie knelled by his side, brushing her fingers along his skin. He looked completely broken, his breathing too weak. She shivered, not knowing what to do. Why did she leave? Did she not know that Steven would die being left out here!? He was going to die if he didn't get medical attention immediately. She couldn't leave him, what if someone came back to hurt him?

Glancing around, Connie stayed by Steven's side. She needed to do something but she was petrified. What if she called and someone came to hurt him?! He was vulnerable, there was no way she could do anything. She didn't know how to fight, she knew how characters fought in books but she didn't even have a weapon.

She opened her book bag, digging through to find something that could do something. There was only her books, but she was able to fish her phone out of her bag. She turned it on quickly, flicking to her mom's contact and put it to her ear after pressing call.

" _You've reached Doctor Maheswaran. Please leave a message. And if you're one of my patients -_ "

Connie ended the call and groaned, she phoned her dad but got the exact same response.

"Come on.. There has to be something I can do.." She mumbled, staring at her phone. The hospital? What would they do about Steven's gem? Steven's dad? She didn't have his number..

She gazed at him tearfully, petrified that she didn't know what to do. Wordlessly, she pulled him close to lay his head on her lap. She stroked his hair, hoping to offer some kind of comfort. He shifted, his good eye opening to peer at her.

"Connie..?" He groaned quietly, flexing his fingers slightly. "What are you doing here..?"

"I came to see you, and read on the beach." She whispered, pushing his hair out of his face. She doesn't like how her fingers are slick with blood. His blood. "You got hurt, someone beat you up.."

"Amethyst." He answered softly, shifting to sit up. He groaned, the action clearly causing him immense harm. Connie held her arms out behind him, ready to catch him if he fell back. "I messed up during the mission, so everyone got upset."

Connie didn't understand how messing up could lead to this. She couldn't come up with a reason to justify this kind of punishment. Grounding maybe, but not pummelling him until the brink of death.

She watched as Steven linked his fingers, and began to run them along his injuries. She watched as they healed, fading away so only smeared blood and bruises remained. He kissed his shoulder, wincing as his shoulder seemed to shift in an unnatural way. He sighed, moving his arm to ensure it wasn't broken.

"How did you do that?" Connie asked, a sense of wonder replacing the growing pit of horror in her stomach momentarily.

"I can heal myself, with my saliva." Steven answered causally, and began examining his clothes. He bit his lip and sighed. "I'm gonna have to fix these again.."

Connie then noticed the lines along his shirt where the stitching was a little uneven. Suddenly, Connie couldn't help but wonder how many times this had happened before.

"Can't you ask for them to buy you new clothes?" She watched as he walked over to the ocean, kneeling in it to wash the blood off of his body. "I'm sure your dad could buy you something."

"I can't, I don't have much money and dad needs his."

"I'm sure he can spare some change for you? Have you asked?"

Steven visibly tensed, his tattered clothes clinging to his battered body. He looked thinner, and Connie couldn't help but notice how fragile he looked in that exact moment.

"I don't want him to know." He explained gently, slowly walking back to her. His legs felt like lead, and he nearly collapsed onto the ground next to her. "The gems mean well, they just.. Don't understand."

"Steven, Amethyst sounded really mad at you." She whispered it, as if saying it too loud would break the world around them. "She hit you. Said she'd _kill_ you.."

"The other gems get really mad at her, sometimes she gets so upset she doesn't know what else to do." Steven laid on his back, staring at the calm sky. "I don't mind it. Keeps her from hurting herself."

"That doesn't give her the right to hurt you."

Steven paused, but he didn't look convinced by it. Instead, he mulled it over in his head. He groaned quietly, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his palms.

"It's my fault." He answered quietly. "My mom would be there to help them, but she's not here. I am."

"You didn't ask to be born." Connie slowly placed her hand on his, he flinched and looked at her with uncertainty. He shivered, squeezing his eyes shut and groaned.

"Mom wanted me, so I need to take care of them."

"No you don't, you're only a kid.."

"I have to! If I don't I'm worthless!"

Connie flinched at Steven's shout, glaring at her from his current position. Realising what he did however, he started to tremble. Tears started coming faster than he could wipe away, and he curled in on himself. He hiccuped, pressing himself into the sand trying to hide from Connie.

"I - I'm sorry, I - I didn't mean to yell! I - I didn't me - mean to.. I - I didn't.. I.." He gripped his arms tightly, staring at Connie. He shifted, and put on hand on his stomach and another over his face. "Pl - Please.. Please.."

"Steven.." She whispered, touching the hand on his face. She rubbed his knuckles, watching him worriedly. "You're safe, I won't hurt you."

"Don't, don't.. Don't. I didn't, I wanted. I just. I wanted.."

Connie shushed him carefully, and lay down next to him. She kept a hand on his, doing her best to ground him. She never read how to help someone having a panic attack. Her primary thought being to just stay near him. He sweats under her touch, gasping for air.

She didn't notice the sound of her phone ringing, her mom trying to reach her.

\--

Connie had gone home, and Steven was alone. He decided it was time to head home, so he walked up the steps carefully. By being light on his feet, he ensured that the creaking of wood didn't upset anyone.

Entering his home, he made a move to head up stairs to his room when Pearl cleared her throat. He looked at her curiously, the pale gem's arms were crossed and she was looking at him like he broke the television again.

"We made you some food, but you never came back. It went off so Amethyst helped herself to it." She noted, crossing her arms and sighed. "There's some clothes upstairs for you, you should be more considerate you know? Be back when we come back."

"I was hanging out with my friend." Steven murmured, and Pearl just shook her head.

" _Rose Quartz_ would be here with her team, we're all that you need. Who else is going to teach you how to be a gem?" She asked, and when Steven deflated she took that as a sign he understood. "Go get changed. We have another gem to take care of."

"I need to sleep Pearl.." Steven whimpered, feeling the exhaustion of having not slept in two days. He only had a couple of hours of sleep in this time period.

"Gems don't need to sleep." Garnet's hands are on his back, the cold of her gauntlets made him shiver as he's pushed towards the warp pad. He didn't have a chance to get changed.

"You'll do better this time, won't you Steven?" Pearl asked as she walked ahead. She was so graceful as she moved, Steven wanted to be graceful like that but he couldn't. He was an ugly, uncoordinated human.

"Won't you Steven? We just want you to be a gem." Amethyst hummed in a loving sort of tone, but her words from before remain ringing in his ears. They dissipate when she puts her arm around him, and gives him a sideways hug.

They don't hate him, Connie just doesn't understand. They loved him, they just wanted him to be better. They don't want him to be weak anymore. He understands, he does not want to be weak either.

He will be better.

\---

It hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts it hurts _iT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS **IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS IT HURTS**_

His body contorts, he screams into the empty beach. The waves lap at his body, seeping salt into the open wound where his gem was. A hole, gaping and bleeding and filling Steven with unimaginable amounts of agony. He clawed at the sand pathetically, completely helpless as Pearl held his gem.

"Look Steven, we tried. We really did.." She sighed, her thumb rubbing the gem comfortingly. She looked, happy. Happier than she's ever been before he believed. He can't tell, his gaze was hazy. "It's not our fault that humans are fragile things, we told Rose you know. We told her it was a waste of time, that humans just aren't worth it. Look at this, you're more pathetic without her. Now you know how we felt when you took her from us."

"I - I.. I.." His throat felt like it was closing up, his whole body felt like it was splitting at the seams. Blood pooling onto the sand. He tried to crawl, tried to get to her. To his gem..

It felt like it was beckoning him, calling him.

"What are you doing?!"

The gems turn as Greg sprinted to them, Connie not too far behind. His eyes were wide in horror, and Connie looked ready to cry as she laid her eyes on Steven.

"What we should have done from the start." Garnet stated bluntly, and in a flash her gauntlets were there. Steven trembled, realising what she was going to do.

"Garnet, no!" Steven pleaded, managing to raise a feeble hand. She didn't even acknowledge him, only Amethyst did with a little laugh.

"C'mon buddy." She pushed him into the ocean more and Steven screamed when more salt entered the wound. He felt it swish in his insides, and he felt bile rising in his throat. He hiccuped, unable to stop crying.

"Gems don't cry!" With a sudden move, Amethyst grabbed Steven's jaw and dislocated it. His response was a strangled cry, his jaw hanging loosely. He faintly heard Greg and Connie gasp while Pearl just giggled. Not like she did when he told her a joke, more.. Genuine?

"I told you, you're not a real gem Steven." She raised his gem, taunting him. "And now, you never will be."

There's a sudden flash, pink pulsing from his gem and knocking everyone back. It hovered in the air, humming with an emotion that shook Steven to his core. He raised a hand again, trying to reach it. Trying to bring it back..

It flashed again. He blacked out.

\---

It stared at her.

She stared back.

Steven's gem stood before them, as Steven, not Rose. His expression was blank, but held a fury beyond words. It - He, took one step forward. The ground shuddered under them, sand and sea shrinking away from his wrath.

"Revolting." His voice was mechanical, merciless. _Not Steven._ "Guardian definition A person who guards or defends something and or someone. This definition can apply to gems."

His gaze fixated on Pearl first.

"Pearl guardianship terminated. Cause for termination, emotional abuse. Mild accounts of physical abuse and neglect." He raised a hand, crystals forming in the air and pointing like daggers. "Solution, elimination."

In one motion, the crystals pierced Pearl's form and her gem fell to the ground. Amethyst's whip wrapped around Pink Steven's arm, and she made a move to pull. He doesn't move, taking the whip with his other hand and loosening it's grip on him. He then proceeded to use it to hurl her across the beach. Out of sight.

This time Garnet sprung to action. She brought her gauntlet into his chest, pushing him back but only by a few inches. He dug his heels into the sand, grabbing onto her to ensure she was unable to move.

"Garnet guardianship terminated. Cause for termination, neglect. Allowed harm to carry out without stepping in." His grip tightened, and her lip curled. Was that _fear?_ "Solution, elimination."

Pink shards struck through Garnet, and two gems landed in the sand upon her destruction. He turned his head as Amethyst ran back into the fray, her head lowered as she charged him. He stepped aside, and she ran into a boulder.

"What the hell is wrong with you! We only did all of that so you could be a gem! We did it for you!" She screeched, bringing her whip out again.

"Inadequate."

Amethyst's physical form is slammed with crystals, but she doesn't explode just yet. Instead, she's able to stare in panic as the pink boy walked towards her.

"Amethyst guardianship terminated. Cause for termination, physical abuse. Used us as a punching bag to let her own emotions out." He grasped her hair, pulling and forcing her to stare into his blank, furious gaze. "Solution, elimination."

She's gone, just like the others. He lifts their gems, they float in his hand before being placed in a bubble. He turned, his gaze now on them. Connie noticed that during all of this, Greg had taken Steven. He was holding his son, checking his pulse and breathing heavily. The man looked ready to faint, and Connie quickly moves to stand in front of them. She doesn't know what she can do when he approached, his footsteps light and heavy all at once.

"Subject Connie Maheswaran. Status alive." Connie noted that the fury was gone, his expression was simply nothing. "Threat status undetermined. Termination unneeded. Viewed as ally."

He walked past her, kneeling down by Steven's side. He looked at Greg, he looked back in horror and fear.

"Subject Greg Universe, system note ask if real last name later. Status alive." Something about the system note made Connie giggle, and she wondered the same thing. "Threat status null. Termination unneeded. Viewed as father. Father defined as a man in relation to his child or children. System note gems do not have fathers, organics do. System note, investigate if he is our father or creator."

Finally, he touches his human body. Pink ghostly fingers rubbing his cheek.

"Ourself, status compromised. Beginning treatment." He leaned down, and kissed his forehead. Momentarily his body was bathed in pink, a soft shining and comforting glimmer overtaking him. It was gone as soon as it appeared, Steven looked healthy again. "Returning back to ourselves."

He pulled human Steven into his lap, resting his chin on his forehead. Connie watched as both of their bodies glowed so brightly she could no longer make sense of their features. It was like they blended together, the object they could focus on was the pink gem that remained in the naval region. The light faded and Steven collapsed on the sand, fully intact.

It was like nothing happened, except for the bubbled gems floating ominously in the background. A grim reminder of their fate ate the hands of Steven's gem. Connie hoped that if they could think in there, they'd think about their actions and how not to do this again.

"Lets.. We should get him to the van to rest.."


End file.
